This past week I was privileged to have a conversation with the author of the TCK blog,
https://settledwayfarer.news.blog/2019/03/14/mk-i-am-enough/ (article link)
I can write from a parent’s perspective on caring for my TCK, but I love to recommend resources that feature the writings of TCK’s themselves.
The author of settledwayfarer.news.blog is a brave, beautiful woman called Abigail. I find myself challenged and encouraged by the testimonials she shares. I’m excited to introduce her blog to you. I hope it brings encouragement to others TCKs and their families.
As the mother of a TCK, I found her entry I Am Enough encouraging– especially the mention of learning to tie shoes. I remember a furlough where someone was concerned about my ability to parent because my child was learning to tie shoes in first grade instead of kindergarten. What I could not adequately explain was that in our country in South Asia, most people wear sandals or other shoes without laces. And the shoes are removed before entering buildings. It is often muddy so no one wants to handle gross, wet shoe laces. So the shoe tying thing wasn’t a “parent failure.” It was simply a skill my daughter learned a year or two later than most children in her passport country. No big deal. Her life and development were not hindered because of the difference of one year. Academically and socially she was doing well. Her doctors and teachers had no concerns, because they had seen other TCK’s go through similar transitions before. Because our daughter shared similarities to children in the USA, it was often hard for others to see that in her mind and heart, she was sorting through life experiences from two different countries and cultures. She wasn’t lagging behind. On the contrary, she was showing amazing resilience as she learned to be herself, enjoy life, master new skills, and relate to people in all sorts of contexts. It was a huge blessing when others could see and appreciate that.
It can be challenging to communicate major culture differences and the long, disorienting process families experience when re-entering their “home” culture. It always helped when people were gracious and chose to ask thoughtful questions instead of jumping to conclusions.
As our daughter develops and grows, she is acquiring skills that will be useful in both her passport country and abroad. This is a good thing, even though there will be challenges along the way. As Abigail describes so well in her post, I Am Enough, God loves and celebrates everything my daughter is. She will be able to engage and bless people from a variety of life experiences with her unique perspectives. And she will have the grace and help of Jesus along the way.
I hope you enjoy Abigail’s blog, settledwayfarer.news.blog !
Thanks for reading!
Links with some good TCK books and magazines:
- Third Culture Kids: A Gift to Care For, written by author and family therapist Ulrika Ernvik, available through amazon.com in paperback & kindle
- Among Worlds, a Magazine for TCKs and Nomads- https://interactionintl.org/publications/among-worlds-magazine/